Showing posts with label ellen barkin's breasts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ellen barkin's breasts. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Wild Bill


It must have been Walter Hill flop month on AMC because I caught two of his biggest. Wild Bill came at a productive, flop-tacular time for Hill: the 90's. I had heard awful, scathing reviews about Wild Bill, but I thought there wasn't anyway it could be that bad... oh dear God I was wrong. It was absolutely worse. The movie starts with Bill (Jeff Bridges, but I'm the dude) hitting Deadwood (which covered all this better later on with some direction from Walter Hill...hmmm) to try and hit it big during the gold rush. The story is juxtoposed with too many annoying side characters and flashbacks. You never get a real sense of story with all the backtracking. Gunfights litter these for no particular reason other than to spice up the dull narrative.

Everybody is miscast. Ellen Barkin as Calamity Jane, Christina Applegate in anything, and The Dude sleepwalking through the lead all are enough to turn the film off immediately. Everything from the look to the direction just smacks of awfulness. This isn't even so bad that it is fun to watch. Even Diane Lane isn't fun... and lemme tell ya that is a hard thing to accomplish.

One wonders if Hill was just in a drug/alcohol stupor until his comeback with an episode of Deadwood and the pretty great tv western Broken Trail. Hill would follow this up with Last Man Standing, Supernova (a long story there...), and Undisputed... all turd sandwiches. Here's your DVD quote... Wild Bill is even WORSE than you would have thought!

0/100

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Ocean's 13


It is amazing how bad sequels can be when all the same creative talent is in place for follow ups as were in place for the original movie. Ocean's 12 was one of the biggest wastes of time I'm ever seen in a theatre. My hopes for this one were slight at best. What I got was at least a return to Danny Ocean's stomping ground of Vegas. Unfortunately, the magic among the actors isn't there anymore. The snappy dialogue has gone the way of the Stardust. Everybody is going through the motions here.

The plot revolves around their friend Reuben (Elliot Gould) getting screwed over on his partnership with Willie Bank (Al Pacino) involving a new casino being built. Ocean (Clooney) vows to get revenge on Bank. Blah blah blah. Two hours later the film thankfully ends.

Kudos has to go to Ellen Barkin who does manage to show at 50 you can still be a fine looking woman. Not much else to praise here. Pacino continues his paycheck collecting and only a cameo from Super Dave Osbourne could elicit a smile from me. This isn't a terrible movie, but a joyless exercise that left me watching the clock

50/100